My ventures left no visible marks
where I walked
yet the surface of the pond was marred
where the deer
and the raccoon stalked
Upon midnights so brightly starred
Their wild spirits led them
to reach
Where my own feet would not go
for the ice popped and cracked beneath
my firmly planted
well-shod
cautious feet
I walked for a time
along
the edge
and on the bank
when the ice was weak
there I fought the briery hedge
to step again
where the ice did not creak
The ice in the center was likely
more sure than that on the rim
where it was full of fractures
and weeds
But I stayed
where I could easily reach the shore
and would not risk drowning
simply to feel free.
Loving the pictures and how the verses are staggered to look like footprints. Great imagery too.
ReplyDelete" I walked for a time
along
the edge
and on the bank
when the ice was weak
there I fought the briery hedge
to step again
where the ice did not creak"
I really enjoyed this part and how the rhyme was slipped in there. :)
I enjoy experimenting with line placement from time to time. Both for the image it conveys, but also for how it might be read.
ReplyDeleteI have only ever felt the urge to do it when writing about nature, or more specifically, the parts of nature I've personally discovered. Maybe it's because there's too much beauty and variation in nature's revelation of herself to try and jam it into a four line, square-like mold. Maybe it's because that's how you discover her wonders; in wandering lines and unexpected breaks.
Enjoy how you link your words with fitting images. Truly captures your emotions and makes your writings more defined. Pleasure visiting your blog, Patrick.
ReplyDelete